When September Ends…

Summer has come and passed

The innocent can never last

wake me up when September ends

 

I’ve always loved that song in its melancholy beauty. I suppose even though I heard the lyrics, I never realized it was written about Billie Joe Armstrong’s father. For those that may not know, I lost my own father in an unfortunate motorcycle accident on Sept. 10, 2003.

I never felt so devastated and it wasn’t because  of the actual death of my father.

It was the death of opportunity. The death of possibility to fix things between us. The death of any hope to regain a father/daughter relationship we once had.

Saying all that, I don’t wish to paint my father as a saint. He was just my father. Funny, sweet, sometimes immature when it came to decisions he made in his life. But he was still my father and no matter what I still loved him. Despite absence and sometimes frustration with him. When my aunt broke the news to me, all I could think about was all the things he wouldn’t be here for. All the things I wouldn’t get to tell him, because without even realizing it, my time to do that had run out.

Mistaken came about, in its very early stages around that time. Actually the original ideas I had for Mistaken was a hybrid of Mistaken and Possess mixed together. Obviously I thought it better to split those two up and focus on the core of Mistaken.

Mistaken became a healing process for me, and I think that is why it was so important that I finish it. That it be the first story I push out into the world. It isn’t a happy tale of romance or adventure of finding your true love. It’s actually quite the opposite.

 

What if someone you love was taken from you?

What dreams would be crushed?

What things did you not get a chance to say or do?

How would you deal?

 

Granted there is a lot more to Mistaken aside from the loss that occurs, but it is definitely a theme within the book. It’s my hope that people will enjoy the read, but maybe also gain something from it. I know it won’t be for everyone and I am fine with that, but I do hope at least one person who has suffered a similar loss can read it and take away what I did from it.

As much as it hurts, one day things will get better and you will be a stronger person because of it.

 

as my memory rests

but never forgets what I lost

wake me up when September ends

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